Last updated on November 9th, 2017

Many couples who are trying to conceive, may feel after some time, that this journey has them feeling like they are going crazy. It is easy to feel anxious about how long it will take to conceive, and you may find that this takes all the joy out of sex. You may keep hoping for the best, only to be disappointed by the arrival of your period. It’s not unusual to feel stressed about all of these things, but the stress may be adding to the delayed conception and low libido.

Stress can cause a number of physiological changes in the body, and this may have a negative effect on fertility. Keeping stress levels low may help to boost fertility, so here are some top tips to reduce feelings of frustration and keep your sanity while trying to conceive:

1. Take control…

There’s nothing worse than feeling out of control of your own life. So, take control. Read up on fertility, keep track of your menstrual cycle and make the lifestyle changes necessary to increase your chances of conception.

2. …But don’t obsess

There’s taking control, and then there’s an unhealthy obsession. Don’t spend your every waking moment reading up on fertility, just make sure you know the general issues. Track your cycle, note your most fertile time, but also allow for times of spontaneous intimacy and lovemaking that is not focused on ‘getting pregnant’.

3. Keep living

It’s easy to get a one-track mind, but try not to neglect other areas of your life. Make sure you are still spending time on your hobbies. Meet up with friends, have a date night with your partner, and lose yourself in a good book. Trying to conceive shouldn’t take over every area of your life, you should still feel like ‘you’.

4. Nurture your relationship…

Relationship problems can add to the worry of conceiving, so make sure you are still spending time and energy on nurturing your relationship. You love your partner, that’s why you’re trying for a baby, so make sure he knows it. Talk about your feelings, but talk about other things too. Keep communication open, and make sure it works both ways.

5. …Especially in the bedroom

It’s no secret that sex can become pretty regimented when you’re trying to conceive. Don’t let your love making become monotonous, and try to avoid demanding immediate sex while holding a basal thermometer. Keep things interesting. Have sex in different places, try new positions, and invest time in intimate foreplay.

6. Find support

Whether it’s your best friend, your mom, or an online forum filled with strangers going through what you are, make sure you have someone to talk to. Don’t bottle things up, talking can help to reduce worry, and help you to feel supported.

7. Exercise

Make sure exercise features in your routine. Regular exercise can help to reduce stress, and help you to feel more positive about yourself. Try to work out a few times each week, not only will it battle stress, but a healthy lifestyle can boost fertility.

8. Take a break

Trying to conceive can be pretty intense. If you find yourself feeling stressed by it, take a break. Give yourself a month off. Stop worrying about temperatures, ovulation and optimum positions for conception. Instead focus on having fun and spending some time together. If you can, try to get a change of scenery during this time too. A weekend away, or even a summer vacation, could help you to get rid of your worries.

• Nauert, R., PhD. (n.d.). High Stress Reduces Fertility | Psych Central News. Retrieved from http://psychcentral.com/news/2010/08/20/high-stress-reduces-fertility/17103.html
• Grish, K. (n.d.). Fit to Be a Mom? How Exercise Affects Your Fertility. Retrieved from http://www.fitnessmagazine.com/health/pregnancy/fertility/how-exercise-affects-fertility/

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